Two lions with shields guard a woman in this allegorical painting of chastity from 1490.
The LDS Church teaches its members to obey the law of chastity, which is a code of morality and modesty. Under this code, all members are taught to be "morally clean in their thoughts, words, and actions" and to abstain from pornography.[24][25] Violations of this code include all premarital sex,[2][3] all homosexual sexual activity,[4] the viewing of pornography,[5][6][7] overtly sexual kissing,[10]: 194 dancing, and touch outside marriage[26] and masturbation.[8][7][9]
Though celestial marriage is the only form of marriage recognized as a sacrament, the church permits sex within government-recognized marital unions, the notable exceptions being same-sex marriage, common law marriage, civil unions (in jurisdictions where marriage is available), and polygamy. The church is sensitive about its historical relationship with polygamy, and entry into a polygamous marriage, even where legal, will result in mandatory consideration of church discipline and possible excommunication.[27]: 90–91 [28] The law of chastity includes standards of modesty in dress, grooming, and appearance which have varied according to cultural norms of the time.[29] Serious offenses of the law of chastity may result in church discipline, including the possibility of excommunication.[12] Penalties from church leaders are stiffer for same-sex sexual sins than for heterosexual ones in matters of general church discipline, missionary requirements, and code of conduct enforcement at church-run universities.[30]
Surveys
LDS teens have the highest rate of self-reported abstention from sexual activity of any US religious group surveyed in 2024.[31][32] A study by church university sociologists published in 1992 found that 60% of 1,000 LDS teen women surveyed reported having had sex before marriage.[33][34][35] A smaller survey of 158 married LDS women in 1995 found that 32% reported having premarital sex.[36]
Illustration of "soaking" or the act of vaginal penetration without subsequent thrusting.
In 2021, reports of LDS Church members "soaking" (sexual insertion occurring, but without subsequent thrusting) as a workaround to the church's sexual restrictions made international news and received millions of views and social media tags.[37][38][39] Many described the rumors as a myth while others stated that they knew people who had participated in the action.[40][37][41] Other articles described a related act among LDS members of "jump humping" where two people soak while another jumps on the bed beside them.[42][43][44] LDS soaking has been discussed on multiple American television series in the 2020s.[11]: 206 [45][46]
On many occasions church leaders have taught that members should not masturbate as part of obedience to the law of chastity.[50] The 1990 edition of the church's youth guidelines pamphlet which stated that the "Lord specifically forbids[...] masturbation",[10]: 186 [51] with the next two editions into 2022 alluding to it with statements forbidding anything that "arouses" any sexual feelings or emotions in one's "own body".[54]
Kissing
Two people kissing
Church leaders have stated that outside of marriage, prolonged and "passionate kisses" are off limits.[57] For example, church president Spencer W. Kimball, called the "soul kiss" an "abomination" that leads to necking, petting, and "illegitimate babies". He further stated that even when dating for a time a kiss should be a "clean, decent, sexless one like the kiss between a mother and son".[58][59] He also stated that kissing during casual dating is "asking for trouble" and that kisses should not be "handed out like pretzels".[59][60] Apostle Richard G. Scott advised that physical expressions of romantic feelings between unmarried individuals should be kept to "those that are comfortable in the presence of your parents".[61][62]
Erotic touch
Church leaders have also condemned erotic touching outside of heterosexual marriage using terms like "necking" for general kissing and stroking of areas outside of the breasts, buttocks, or groin region, and "petting" for fondling another in private areas whether under or over clothing.[10]: 195 [63][59] Despite the policies on extramarital sex and making out, a 2007 survey of over 1,000 BYU students showed that 4% of single women and 3% of single men had participated in oral sex or intercourse while dating. Additionally, 54% of men and 46% of women BYU students reported "making out and intense kissing" while dating.[64]
Oral sex
In the early 1980s, the church explicitly banned oral sex even for married couples as it was considered an "unnatural, impure, or unholy practice", which reflected verbiage for sexual misconduct in the church's General Handbook.[65][66] In a January 5, 1982, First Presidency letter to bishops and other local leaders, it was explicitly stated that members who participated in any oral sex were barred from the temple unless they "repented and discontinued" this practice.[67][68] In a popular book sold by the church's bookstore and cowritten by a BYU professor, the authors state that oral sex is unworthy and impure for married couples.[69][70][71] An LDS magazine published a bishop's teaching in 2013 that oral sex was forbidden before marriage.[72] Two BYU graduate LDS sex therapists, however, publicly stated in 2013 that oral sex was acceptable for married couples[73] as did another LDS therapist in 2014.[74]
LDS Church leaders have repeatedly condemned the use of sexually arousing literature[75] and visual material for decades.[76][77] Rhetoric has softened over time, however.[5] They have compared pornography to a plague[78] or epidemic[79][80] that is overpoweringly addictive like hard drugs such as cocaine on multiple occasions.[86] The church has also stated that viewing erotic material can become a habit that is "almost impossible to break"[87] which can metaphorically "blast a crater" in the brain.[88] The church hosts meetings and has a website[89] to assist members who wish to curb their consumption of pornographic material,[90][6] and has asked church members to attend an anti-pornography rally.[91] Church leaders have also stated that women who dress immodestly become pornography to men around them.[92]
The Church Handbook states that the three bishopric members should ensure that members from ages 12 to 17 are interviewed twice a year during which they are to discuss the "importance of obeying the commandments, particularly[...] refraining from any kind of sexual activity, and refraining from viewing, reading, or listening to pornographic material."[93] It also states that disciplinary council should not be called for members "who are struggling with pornography or self-abuse."[94]
Research
Sociological research into pornography and LDS individuals has included one BYU study that showed of 192 male BYU students ages 18–27, 100% of the sample considered viewing pornography "unacceptable". However, 35% reported having used pornography in the past 12 months, with 9.2% of the entire sample reporting viewing pornography at least once in the last month.[95] No data was collected on female students. A nationwide study of paid porn subscriptions showed that the predominantly LDS state of Utah had the highest subscription rate of any state.[96][97] Utah's LDS then governor Gary Herbert officially declared pornography to be a public health crisis in Utah in 2016.[98] In 2017 the church school BYU released a study using data gathered online from nearly 700 unmarried English-speaking adults on the effects of religiosity on perceptions of porn addictiveness and relationship anxiety.[99] The results showed that seeing oneself as addicted to pornography generated far more anxiety- and shame-related negative outcomes individually and in romantic relationships than any potential negative effects of consuming sexually explicit material. Additionally, individuals reporting higher religiosity were more likely to consider themselves addicted to porn regardless of their comparative usage rate.[100][101]
Dancing
Currently and in the past LDS Church leaders have looked down on dancing that includes full-body contact, is suggestive of sexual behavior, or has same-sex romantic overtones.[102][53]: 23 A 1972 youth guide stated that unapproved dance movements that were deemed vulgar included shoulder or hip shaking, body jerking, crouching, slumping over, and backbending.[103][104]
Teachings on birth control have changed over the course of the church's history going from condemning it as sinful to allowing it.[107] The current church stance as of 2023 is that "decisions about birth control and the consequences of those decisions rest solely with each married couple" and that they should consider "the physical and mental health of the mother and father and their capacity to provide the basic necessities of life for their children" when planning a family.[108][109] The church discourages surgical sterilization, like vasectomies and tubal ligation.[108][110][109] In the past the use of birth control methods including artificial contraception was explicitly condemned as pernicious and sinful. As recently as 2003 a church manual was published containing a quote from the late church president Spencer W. Kimball stating that the church does not "condone nor approve of" measures of contraception which greatly "limit the family".[111][112]
The LDS Church opposes elective abortion "for personal or social convenience", but states that abortion could be an acceptable option in cases of rape, incest, danger to the health or life of the mother, or where the fetus has been diagnosed with "severe defects that will not allow the baby to survive beyond birth."[113]: 45 [114] In a 2011 US-wide Pew poll, of the 600 LDS-identifying respondents, 27% said abortion should be legal in all or most cases, and 70% said it should be illegal in all or most cases.[115]
A couple following their marriage sealing ceremony in the Manti Utah Temple
From the 1830s, heterosexual marriage has been a central and distinctive component of the Latter Day Saint theology. LDS teachings on marriage begins with the belief that, if performed by a person who has the requisite priesthood authority, a marriage may continue in the afterlife. Such a marriage is called a celestial marriage or a temple marriage, and is a particular instance of a sealing which binds people together in the afterlife.[116] Celestial marriage is considered to be a requirement for entry into the highest degree of the celestial kingdom (the highest degree of heaven in LDS theology), and is thought to allow the participants to continue to have spirit children in the afterlife and become gods.[17][117][4] According to LDS belief, the continuance of a celestial marriage in the afterlife is contingent upon the couple remaining righteous.
A woman in ceremonial temple clothing used during the LDS sealing sits next to the sealing room altar over which the wedding ceremony is performed. The infinite reflection of the double mirrors is seen in the background.
From 1852 until 1890, the LDS Church openly authorized polygamous marriages (an LDS term for polygamy) between one man and multiple wives, though polygamous families continued cohabitating into the 1950s.[118] The LDS Church now embraces monogamy and the nuclear family. Members who are found entering into or solemnizing polygamous marriages or associating with polygamous groups are now subject to church discipline and possible excommunication.[27]: 90–91 The topic of same-sex marriage has been one of the church's foremost public concerns since 1993.[119]: 1
Restrictions on marriage
As of 2024[update], the church teaches that God does not approve of same-sex marriage.[120] The church played an important role in defeating same-sex marriage legalization in six US states in the late 1990s and early 2000s.[121] Nearly every decade for over a century—beginning with the church's formation in the 1830s until the 1970s—saw some denunciations of interracial marriages (miscegenation), with most statements focusing on Black–White marriages.[122]: 42–43 Until 2013 at least one official church manual in use continued discouraging interracial marriages.[123] In 2013, the church disavowed its previous teachings on interracial marriage for the first time.[124][125]: 59 [126]
In order to receive church ordinances such as baptism,[134] and to enter church temples, non-heterosexual adherents are required to live a celibate lifestyle without any sexual expression.[137] Additionally, in the church's plan of salvation non-celibate gay and lesbian individuals will not be allowed in the top tier of heaven to receive exaltation unless they repent, and a heterosexual marriage is a requirement for exaltation.[117][4] The church's policies and treatment of LGBT people has long been a source of controversy both within and outside the church.[138][139][140] They have also been a significant cause of disagreement and disaffection by members.[141][142][143]
Church leaders previously taught that homosexuality was a curable condition.[144][145] They counseled members that they could and should change their attractions,[146] and provided therapy and programs with that goal.[149] Even celibate gay people were subject to excommunication.[148]: 382, 422 [150]: 139
Gender identity and roles play an important part in LDS theology which teaches a strict binary of spiritual gender as literal offspring of Heavenly Parents.[151][152] Part of Sunday Church meetings are currently divided by biological sex,[153] and for most of the 1800s church presidents Joseph Smith and Brigham Young had men, women, and children sit separately for all Sunday meetings.[148]: 410, 413–414 Expressions and identities for sexuality and gender are "separate, but related" aspects of a person[154] and stem from similar biological origins.[155]
The LDS Church is supportive of traditional gender roles. Women have a certain degree of authority in some areas, including leadership positions with authority over children and other women, although these women leaders receive supervision and guidance by male priesthood-holding leaders.[156][157] Women are "endowed" with priesthood power, but are not ordained to priesthood office.[158] Though not considered clergy, women play a significant part in the operation of local congregations[159]
^ abcdSimmons, Brian (December 2017). Coming out Mormon: An examination of religious orientation, spiritual trauma, and PTSD among Mormon and ex-Mormon LGBTQQA adults(PDF) (PhD). Athens, Georgia: University of Georgia. p. 65. [A] current temple recommend [allows one] to participate in temple ordinances. In order to hold a current temple recommend, a person must attest to their ecclesiastical leaders that they maintain faith in the LDS Church, and live according to the standards (including no sexual activity outside of heterosexual marriage and abstaining from coffee, tea, alcohol, tobacco, and illicit drugs).
^ abcdPetrey, Taylor G. (February 4, 2015). "My Husband's Not Gay: Homosexuality and the LDS Church". Religion & Politics. St. Louis, Missouri: Washington University in St. Louis. John C. Danforth Center on Religion and Politics. Retrieved February 27, 2023. In the Mormon cosmos, as presently understood, there is simply no room for same-sex relationships. For Mormons, the afterlife consists of heterosexual pairs of divinized men and women. Often church leaders have counseled Mormons who experience same-sex attraction that their unwelcome feelings will disappear in the afterlife. ... [T]he very structure of heaven can only accommodate opposite-sex marriages.
^ abcdeStephenson, Kathy (April 16, 2021). "Latter-day Saint sex therapist plans to fight to keep her church membership". Salt Lake Tribune. Retrieved April 3, 2023. Church spokesman Eric Hawkins said in a statement that ... 'The church teaches its members to be morally clean in every way, and that sexual feelings are given by God and should be used in ways he has commanded,' he said, adding that the church condemns pornography in any form and sees masturbation as immoral.
^Carter, K. Codell (1992). "Godhood". In Ludlow, Daniel H. (ed.). Encyclopedia of Mormonism. New York City: Macmillan Publishers. pp. 553, 555. ISBN978-0-02-904040-9. They [resurrected and perfected mortals] will dwell again with God the Father, and live and act like him in endless worlds of happiness ... above all they will have the power of procreating endless lives. ... Those who become like him will likewise contribute to this eternal process by adding further spirit offspring to the eternal family.
^Gospel Fundamentals(PDF) (2002 ed.). Salt Lake City: LDS Church. p. 201. They [the people who will live in the celestial kingdom] will receive everything our Father in Heaven has and will become like Him. They will even be able to have spirit children and make new worlds for them to live on, and do all the things our Father in Heaven has done.
^Schoenkopf, Rebecca (September 28, 2012). "Mormons Apparently Not Allowed To Do Sex With Their Mouths". wonkette.com. Commie Girl Industries, Inc. LDS President Harold B. Lee: I was shocked to have you raise the question about 'oral lovemaking in the genital area among married couples.' Heaven forbid any such degrading activities which would be abhorrent in the sight of the Lord. For any Latter-day Saint, and particularly those who have been taught in the sacred ordinances of the temple, to engage in any kind of perversions of this sacred God-given gift of procreation, would be sure to bring down the condemnation of the Lord whom we would offend were we to engage in any such practice.
^Ingraham, Mike (July 20, 2000). "Sex in Zion: A manual for Mormons, written by a Logan native, is leaping off the shelves". The Herald Journal. Logan, Utah. The index is not so coy. 'Oral sex, 163-71' it says. That is the chapter 'Drawing the Line.' 'We wrestled with that,' Brinley says. The authors evidently decided to take their cue from President Boyd K. Packer who told BYU students 'If something unworthy has become part of your relationship, don't ever do it again! Now what exactly do I mean by that? You know what I mean by that.'
^Fulton, Ben (June 11, 2007). "The Missionary Position: An LDS guide joins the fray of sexy religious books". Salt Lake City Weekly. Then there's a topic so sensitive it dare not speak its name, except to those curious enough to look it up in the index. ... Discussion of oral sex requires a definition of oral sex, a duty Brinley was loath to navigate. Most Mormons already consider the practice impure anyway, because it's practiced by gays, lesbians and prostitutes. Besides, Brinley's confident that readers know what the chapter's discussing by its tone alone. 'When we talk about sexual acts that are unworthy and unnatural, people know what we're talking about. We're not talking about biting your wife's ear,' he says. "[Oral sex] is something you just don't talk about. It's like getting a hole-in-one on Sunday. You're not supposed to be on the golf course anyway, so how can you tell anyone?'
^Eastland, Larry (November 7, 2013). "A YSA Bishop Talks to the Sisters About Intimacy". Meridian Magazine. I have counseled too many of the brethren who are currently in a lustful relationship doing things they know are wrong including improper touching and oral sex. ... So that there is no misunderstanding about what I am saying, let me be both blunt and indelicate: ... 3. No oral sex.
^Piper, Rachel (September 4, 2013). "The (Mormon) Sex Girls Explain It All". Salt Lake City Weekly. Is oral sex forbidden by the LDS Church? Kristin Hodson: No, except in myths and urban legends. Alisha Worthington: And there could be some bishops who you go in and ask who are like, "Oh, no." Again, it's who you get. KH: There's only "don't do anything unnatural," or abusive or coercive. It's pretty neutral. [Oral] is just part of marital bonding, part of the buffet of sexual experiences.
^Helfer Parker, Natasha (March 24, 2014). "The Mormon Therapist on Approaching Sexual Decisions". Sunstone. I have the same question about oral sex: I've heard one camp say that it's not spiritually uplifting and therefore wrong, while the other says that once you're married anything is game. So which is it? ... It is my opinion that any sexual experience between spouses can be spiritually uplifting, as long as both are comfortable and enjoying one another. ... Let's not give other fallible humans the authority to make decisions regarding our most private, personal pleasure.
^"Catholic and LDS Leaders Ask Support for Anti-Porno Rally". Daily Herald. United Press International. November 6, 1977. p. 16. Archived from the original on December 8, 2017. The bishop of Salt Lake's Catholic Diocese and the First Presidency of the Mormon church have joined in a call for church members to attend an anti-pornography rally Nov. 12.[...] 'We encourage members of the church to attend (the rally) and to invite their friends and neighbors to also attend.'
^"6.7.1". Handbook 1: Stake Presidents and Bishops. Salt Lake City, Utah: LDS Church. 2010. Archived from the original on November 15, 2017. Failure to Comply with Some Church Standards: A disciplinary council should not be held to discipline or threaten members who do not comply with the Word of Wisdom, who are struggling with pornography or self-abuse, or whose transgressions consist of omissions, such as failure to pay tithing, inactivity in the Church, or inattention to Church duties.
^ abBeaver, Michelle (March 11, 2011). "Mormon church has a fractured history with gays". The Mercury News. San Jose, California: Digital First Media. Retrieved January 16, 2023. There are three levels to the heaven in which Mormons believe, and to make it to the highest level, one must be married. Perhaps the most sacred church ordinance is the temple marriage, a "sealing" between a man and a woman that is believed to be eternal, according to Richley Crapo, a Utah State University professor. There is no place for homosexuality in Mormon marriages, and no place for noncelibate homosexuals in the top level of Mormon heaven, unless that person has repented accordingly in the afterlife.
^Embry, Jessie L. (1994). "The History of Polygamy". heritage.utah.gov. Utah State Historical Society. Those involved in plural marriages after 1904 were excommunicated; and those married between 1890 and 1904 were not to have church callings where other members would have to sustain them. Although the Mormon church officially prohibited new plural marriages after 1904, many plural husbands and wives continued to cohabit until their deaths in the 1940s and 1950s.
^Park, Benjamin (April 18, 2017). "Why it's time for the Mormon Church to revisit its diverse past". The Conversation. Further, the faith has a long history of shunning interracial relationships. At points, some of its leaders even flirted with theories of eugenics, or the belief that they could help cultivate a pure race. Just until four years ago [2013], a youth manual informed young men that the Church 'recommend[s] that people marry those who are of the same racial background.'
^Janan Graham-Russell (August 28, 2016). "Choosing to Stay in the Mormon Church Despite Its Racist Legacy". The Atlantic. Archived from the original on August 21, 2022 – via Internet Archive. [T]he LDS church quietly released an essay on race and the priesthood, attempting to explain the restriction's origin. It goes on to repudiate the racism and racist folklore that had been used to explain the restriction in the past. ... Additionally, church leaders have sought to clarify the meaning of the word 'blackness' in Mormon theology—it is often used not just as a reference to skin color, but also as a symbol of disobedience to God.
^Kimball, Spencer W. (1976) [1969]. The Miracle of Forgiveness (23rd print ed.). Bookcraft. p. 82. ISBN978-0-88494-192-7. Retrieved February 27, 2023 – via Internet Archive. [Homosexuality] is curable and forgivable. ... Certainly it can be overcome .... [T]o those who say that this practice ... is incurable, I respond: 'How can you say the door cannot be opened until your knuckles are bloody ...? It can be done.'
