18 February 1967 (1967-02-18) – 14 September 1971 (1971-09-14)
Never Mind the Quality, Feel the Width is a British television sitcom first broadcast in 1967 as a single play in the Armchair Theatre anthology series, later becoming a series of half-hour episodes, which ran until 1971. A total of 40 episodes were made; along with a mini episode that was featured in ITV's All Star Comedy Carnival in 1969.[1]
The plot revolves around two tailors in business together. Manny Cohen, played by John Bluthal, is Jewish, and Patrick Kelly, played by Joe Lynch, is Irish Catholic. Above their shop works Lewtas (Bernard Spear), who is also Jewish and imports cloth. Two further prominent characters in the first three series are Rabbi Levy (Christopher Benjamin in the pilot, thereafter Cyril Shaps) from the local synagogue, and Father Ryan (Denis Carey in the pilot, thereafter Eamon Kelly) from the local Catholic church.
One episode features Manny and Patrick trading the rights to display their pictures around the shop. Patrick has two pictures of the Pope on the wall, while Manny has one of Moshe Dayan. Manny's comment is "It's the going rate. Two Popes to one Moshe." Another episode, "The Not So Kosher Cantor", has Patrick, a talented singer, filling in at the synagogue for a sick cantor, on the occasion of a visit by the Chief Rabbi. Coached to sing phonetically in Hebrew, Patrick performs, every moment milked for comedic value. Finally, the Chief Rabbi congratulates Patrick but reveals he knows something is up. When asked how he knows, he replies that at the end of the service, "you genuflected and made the sign of the cross!"
In 1973, Bluthal and Lynch reprised their roles in a film spin-off.
DVD release
A 4-disc set of the show, containing the Thames TV series, was released on DVD in 28 June 2010, by Network.[2] An episode from the ABC era (Man Shall Not Live By Bread Alone) was featured in a boxset titled ABC Nights In, which was also released by Network on 22 December 2020.[3]
Episodes
The pilot and the first two series were produced by ABC; however, the second series (of six episodes) did not air until just after Thames Television launched on 30 July 1968, which initially aired the six episodes from that series over August and September that year. Of the 40 episodes made, 11 are believed to no longer exist. These are the pilot, five of the six episodes from Series 1, and five of the six episodes from Series 2.[4]
Pilot (1967)
No. overall
No. in series
Title
Archival Status
Original air date
1
1
"Never Mind the Quality, Feel the Width"
Missing
18 February 1967 (1967-02-18)
Series One (1967)
No. overall
No. in series
Title
Archival Status
Original air date
2
1
"Cohen & Kelly"
Missing
25 November 1967 (1967-11-25)
3
2
"Not So Much A Sanctuary, More A Penance"
Missing
2 December 1967 (1967-12-02)
4
3
"Remember That Thou Keep Holy"
Missing
9 December 1967 (1967-12-09)
5
4
"Man Shall Not Live By Bread Alone"
Exists
16 December 1967 (1967-12-16)
6
5
"Leopards Can Change Their Spots"
Missing
23 December 1967 (1967-12-23)
7
6
"A Flower of Israel"
Missing
30 December 1967 (1967-12-30)
Series Two (1968)
No. overall
No. in series
Title
Archival Status
Original air date
8
1
"And a Yamulka to Match"
Missing
13 August 1968 (1968-08-13)
9
2
"A Madonna For Manny"
Missing
20 August 1968 (1968-08-20)
10
3
"And Leave the Rest of the World Behind"
Missing
3 September 1968 (1968-09-03)
11
4
"A Suit Fit for a Prince"
Missing
10 September 1968 (1968-09-10)
12
5
"Hello Mother, Hello Father"
Exists
17 September 1968 (1968-09-17)
13
6
"All That Glitters is Not Gelt"
Exists
24 September 1968 (1968-09-24)
Christmas Special (1968)
No. overall
No. in series
Title
Archival Status
Original air date
14
1
"I'm Dreaming of a Kosher Christmas"
Exists
26 December 1968 (1968-12-26)
Series Three (1969)
No. overall
No. in series
Title
Archival Status
Original air date
15
1
"Old Soldiers Never Die"
Exists
21 August 1969 (1969-08-21)
16
2
"Situations Vacant"
Exists
28 August 1969 (1969-08-28)
17
3
"David Kossoff? He's a Friend of Mine"
Exists
4 September 1969 (1969-09-04)
18
4
"Arrividerci Roma"
Exists
11 September 1969 (1969-09-11)
19
5
"It's the Thourght that Counts"
Exists
18 September 1969 (1969-09-18)
20
6
"And a Brother a Priest"
Exists
25 September 1969 (1969-09-25)
Christmas Special (1969)
No. overall
No. in series
Title
Archival Status
Original air date
21
1
""All Star Comedy Carnival" (mini episode)"
Missing
25 December 1969 (1969-12-25)
Series Four (1970)
No. overall
No. in series
Title
Archival Status
Original air date
22
1
"Blood is Thinner than Water"
Exists
25 June 1970 (1970-06-25)
23
2
"Without Prejudice"
Exists
2 July 1970 (1970-07-02)
24
3
"New Worlds for Old"
Exists
9 July 1970 (1970-07-09)
25
4
"What You've Never Had, You Never Miss"
Exists
16 July 1970 (1970-07-16)
26
5
"Miracles to Measure"
Exists
23 July 1970 (1970-07-23)
27
6
"Only Four Can Play"
Exists
30 July 1970 (1970-07-30)
Series Five (1970–71)
No. overall
No. in series
Title
Archival Status
Original air date
28
1
"And Ecumenicals to You"
Exists
15 December 1970 (1970-12-15)
29
2
"I'll Take You Home Again, Kathleen"
Exists
22 December 1970 (1970-12-22)
30
3
"Twenty Years On"
Exists
29 December 1970 (1970-12-29)
31
4
"A Question of Policy"
Exists
5 January 1971 (1971-01-05)
32
5
"The Not So Kosher Cantor"
Exists
12 January 1971 (1971-01-12)
33
6
"And Nobody Knew They Were There"
Exists
19 January 1971 (1971-01-19)
34
7
"You Will Go To The Ball, Manny Cohen"
Exists
26 January 1971 (1971-01-26)
Episodes 1, 3, 4 and 7 of Series 5 were made in black-and-white due to the ITV Colour Strike.
